Greek Life

Thank goodness I start work tomorrow because these past two days have been torturous. Boredom engulfed me into a swirling vortex of Hulu shows and Youtube videos. I think I've started to become delirious- I even got on the wrong train to Jim and Lindsay's tonight. Two stops after I sat down, I looked up and realized I'd gone in the completely wrong direction. I also realized that the guy sitting next to me was picking his nose. Awesome.

I know that there are probably 8,000 things I could've done these past few days: set up meetings with teachers about S.A.I.L., signed up for dance classes, looked into event gigs my mom sent me, etc. But I didn't. I'm telling you, when I have a lot to do, I can't do anything. You'd think my productivity would improve as I mature and accept that there will never be an end to the task list, but I still can't focus on more than one thing at a time. I want to become settled in my new job before I start dance classes. I want to get in the routine of working and dance classes before I add in facilitating S.A.I.L. programs in schools. I want to get into the groove of working, dance, and S.A.I.L. before I audition for shows/prepare to do a Miss New York local pageant. And once I'm balancing all of that, then I think I'll apply for some grad programs in Journalism. Call it procrastination, but I call it maintaining sanity. I did go to the gym today for the first time in....awhile. Disheartening as it is to see how far I am from being able to do my Miss Virginia work out, a step is a step.

Phi Mu 2010 graduating class

During one of my many attempts to momentarily cure boredom on Facebook yesterday, I noticed that college homecomings are quickly approaching. I can't attend mine, unfortunately, but my Facebook is swamped with Homecoming King and Queen campaigns. Of course, my sorority- Phi Mu- has a fabulous representative who was a few years younger than me. This got me thinking about my days in Greek Life.

Bid Day

Fraternities and sororities get a bad reputation because of hazing and movie portrayals of Greek parties. Sadly, many of the stereotypes have merit, as seen in story after story of injuries and death involving alcohol and dangerous stunts forced upon pledges. This is why, despite being Greek myself, I strongly encourage younger girls I know to evaluate the Greek systems at their universities before joining. Had I ever been forced to guzzle crazy amounts of alcohol or been demoralized by the older girls in any way, I would have walked right out the door. Not out of haughtiness, but because I don't understand the concept of wanting to befriend people who torture you. And why would I want to be associated with an organization that oozes lack of class and recklessness? Lucky for me, Phi Mu at CNU has extraordinary members who stay true to the the strict "no hazing" policy that is supposed to be followed by every sorority.

Spring Break cruise in the Bahamas with eight other sisters

One of the most misguided notions about Greek organizations is the idea that "you're buying your friends." Hate to break it to you, but there are dues for a cappella groups, sports teams, and and almost any other club. Also, when you go to college, isn't it the point to meet new people? Sure, education is the primary focus, but when you don't know anyone around you, opportunities to get involved are crucial. Greek Life simply offers another option for forming a new circle of friends. You can't accuse me of "buying" them when I was friends with plenty of them before ever rushing (I went through recruitment as a sophomore) and am friends with plenty of people outside of Greek Life. I don't need to buy my friends. I'm not THAT socially inept.

2010 formal

Coinciding with the frustration I feel towards those who view sororities as purchased cliques is the fact that each girl in a sorority is defined by the actions of 60 other girls (that was in my case...most of the time many, many more). I'm sorry, but I can't babysit 60 college-aged females to make sure they don't do anything I wouldn't do. If one Phi Mu made a poor decision or went on a date with some girl's ex-boyfriend, all of a sudden that girl and her friends hated me since I was a Phi Mu, too. Don't you see how ridiculous that is? If a girl on the soccer team makes someone mad, the whole soccer team isn't to blame. Yet any choice made by a sorority girl automatically reflects the entire group. Of course that all for one and one for all climate had its perks when sisters had positive reputations. Still, I urge everyone to not pass judgement on individuals of a group based on one, two, or even ten other members. Sorority girls are not all brainwashed carbon copies of each other. We're individuals who joined deeply historical organizations that aim at bettering members through required lectures, forums, and traditions. And we become really close friends. Is that so wrong? Well, yes, if you're talking about a chapter that lives up to the stereotypes mentioned earlier. But no, not if you knew mine.

My big and me congratulating my little after her initiation

I mentioned the history of Greek organizations because that is a component which is often overshadowed by the social aspect. Initiation and formal meetings hold secrets that only members are to know because of the indescribable bond formed when realizing that women have kept these procedures to themselves for over one hundred years. Additionally, when Phi Mu was founded in 1852, these procedures were necessary for a group of women to meet without being oppressed. Love, honor, and truth are the three values of Phi Mu, as stated in the public creed. Founding members were upstanding, ethical women who deeply believed in these ideals. To be a part of something with such respectable roots is an exciting privilege.

After the pageant

When it all boils down, my experience with Greek Life was phenomenal. So many of my sisters are still my closest friends and confidants. I remember once when 14 of them caravanned an hour to watch me in a local pageant to qualify for Miss Virginia. Naturally, that was one of the locals I didn't win, but I felt like a million bucks with all of the love they showered on me afterwards. They provide a support system that has proven to be unconditional time after time. I can't speak for everyone, but I am so proud to forever be a part of such a glorious group of young women.